


How to Ask a Guy Out

by Patchwork drabbles (PurplePatchwork)



Series: RusAme Drabbles [65]
Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, Humor, M/M, Misunderstandings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-29
Updated: 2017-12-29
Packaged: 2019-02-23 15:38:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 596
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13193193
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PurplePatchwork/pseuds/Patchwork%20drabbles
Summary: Sometimes, working as a cashier may lead to some interesting conversations.





	How to Ask a Guy Out

It was an easy day at the supermarket, not a lot of customers, not too many hiccups. Which meant Alfred was bored out of his mind. Scanning item after item after item, taking breaks to read comics, actually _hoping_ someone would knock over the display with tartar sauce so he had some cleaning to do. Boredom led to frustration and made him almost go insane.

Which was why Alfred was sort of happy when a newcomer entered the store, someone he hadn’t seen before. Tall, pale, messy locks, eyes a borderline purple hue. Hot stuff, so to speak.

Alfred lazily followed the man with his eyes as he consulted a clean shopping list, grabbed himself a basket, disappeared into the last aisle (liquor and salty snacks). Alfred counted the seconds until he saw the man reappear (three hundred and thirty-one), this time carrying several items. Seeing as no other cash register was open at this hour, Alfred decided to square his shoulders in preparation, trying to act like he hadn’t just been ogling the man now walking over to him. He did send a beaming smile once the customer was close enough to make himself be noticed, not wanting to seem rude.

“Good evening!”

The man stopped, blinking rapidly, as if Alfred had caught him by surprise. Instead of replying, he simply nodded, before carefully unloading his basket.

Alfred couldn’t help but being slightly peeved. He didn’t ask for much, just a friendly “hello” would do the trick! People these days were far too busy for pleasantries. Tsk.

Alfred felt extra-talkative while scanning the man’s items. “Nice weather today huh? After all that rain of these past few weeks, I mean. Sure is nice to have a ray of sun every once in a while.”

“Ah…” His friend was way too distracted. Which only made Alfred want to take it further.

“I mean, not that I’m complaining. But all that rain sucks balls, amiright?”

This finally seemed to grab the man’s attention, his eyes widening as he stared Alfred down. Alfred stared right back, hands continuing their job of scanning items, although he did start to feel a little uneasy under this much scrutiny.

“You suck balls?” was the first sentence to finally leave the stranger’s lips. Alfred’s movements slowed down. Came to a complete stop. His jaw dropped.

“Excuse me?”

His companion quickly set to explaining himself, making wild gesticulations. “Ah, sucking balls! Like, with men, yes?”

Alfred cocked an eyebrow. Was this guy hitting on him? “Dude, if you want me to blow you, you gotta ask me out to dinner first,” he joked.

However, instead of the expected embarrassment, the man simply smiled. “Yes! Dinner! I cook?”

Something clicked.

“Wait…English isn’t your first language, is it?”

The man sheepishly shook his head, big smile still in place.

Alfred sighed. It had been a simply misunderstanding. The weather sucking balls, men sucking each other off…anyone could make that mistake.

On the other hand…

He gave the guy a quick once-over. His first impression didn’t come back to bite him in the ass; up close, the guy was even more handsome than Alfred had thought him to be. Oh well. Worth the shot.

“Okay, deal,” he said, scanning the final items. “I’ll come over to your place for dinner. But uh, lemme help you with your English before we get…intimate. Kay? Oh, and the name’s Alfred.”

“Ivan,” the other said warmly, only seeming to have understood half of what Alfred had said, enthusiastic nonetheless. Kind of endearing, too.

Misunderstanding had their advantages.


End file.
